Back again with an article! I’m on a roll lately and I LOVE it!
This morning I came across something nice on one of my friends’ Instagram account. It was a photo of a message her boyfriend had left her, randomly showing her love on a regular day.
It made my heart smile, but not only. What it also did was inspire me to write a new entry. This one is going to be a bit personal, super mushy and moist like Ocy (one of my crazy girls) would say. Hey, it’s a diary, right? Ha!
One of the reasons why it made me smile is the fact that my friend is happy in her relationship. He actually makes her happy thanks to all the little things he does for her.
To me, romanticism is not always about fancy dinners or trips, big surprises, and events. Sure it makes me happy when I get invited to a fancy date every once in a while, but to me, the core of it resides in the simple things. All the things that your significant other does on regular days, for no specific reasons.
It’s the random sweet message in the morning reminding her/him that you love them. It’s sitting down for hours to watch something you are not interested in, just because he/she is. It’s showing with no limits how much you care, how much you listen, to what extent you understand. Basic relationship habits some may say, but trust me, a lot of people miss on beautiful and fulfilling relationships just because they fail to do those little things when they should.
The way you act when you are interested in dating someone should be the way you remain throughout the entire relationship. It’s not about getting the person then taking him/her for granted. That’s a no, no.
A lot of people also fail to let go of their ego when it comes to relationships. I’m not talking about staying with someone who mistreats you, just because you think love is supposed to be hard to end beautifully (BIG JOKE), or giving up at the first little mistake. I’m talking about people missing out on great relationships because they were too proud to say I Love You, I Miss You, and I’m Sorry when they needed to. Because it makes them look weak or whatever reason those people come up with, and this is wrong on so many levels.
If you feel something, just say it. If you feel like calling just to hear his/her voice, just do it. If you have time to surprise him/her by going on a spontaneous date, do it. The little and simple things.
As most know, I’m a very expressive person. Be it when I’m happy, upset, sad, whatever it is! I just say things the way I feel them (I’m still working on my delivery method for some of those feelings, but that’s a story for another day lol). I have a thing I call the color boxes. In my mind there are like three boxes with three different colors, and each represents a phase and its characteristics when it comes to relationships.
The Blue Box: Hey, how you doin’? PICK YOUR PHONE! HEY! HEY! HEY!
The Yellow Box: You give, I give, I got your back, I trust you and We’re in this together.
The Red Box: I Got 99 (fake) Problems But My Girl Ain’t One
When you start being in the Blue Box, it can’t be too good. Unless your partner likes being controled and feeling owned, it’s not going to get you anywhere. It’s good to want to be with the person you love, but having space and time to yourself is as important. It helps for a healthy relationship and it’s good to miss one another from time to time.
When you’re in the Red Box, it’s not good at all. At some point in your life and when you get older, you understand the importance of building a relationship that will last a lifetime. For that to become a reality, you have to always cherish the person next to you. You have to like him/her as a person, because that’s what keeps the love going. Never take someone for granted and don’t start being indifferent.
The Yellow Box is where you want to be. It’s the right middle. You can add whatever makes of a relationship a strong one for you, but that’s where I work hard to be. And so far, from my experience it has worked. Always show appreciation for your partners’ efforts and make some yourself. You won’t know how happy it makes them until you try (Not just once, come on people!)
I’m not saying that you should be buying gifts or calling your significant other all the time, that you should cancel your own life just for them to know that you care and that you’re always going to be there.
I’m not saying that you should just sit down and assume that the other person knows how you feel, without you needing to say it.
It’s all about balance. Always.
I’m no relationship expert, I’m just speaking based on my experience. Even after my relationships ended, I never regretted being expressive and honest and even when it took me time to move on, when I did, it was clean and without hatred.
Because I had been honest, loving, and caring with the person. So never keep those feelings inside, no matter who’s in front of you.
You will find someone who will work hard to be in the Yellow Box for you, and you’ll see how happy that makes you. Just like my friend is right now. Just like I am right now.
So, this is it. I’m sorry for the long article, but I just had a lot to say! Ha!
Special thanks to my Pinky for inspiring this one and to my Babe for showing me how happy love could make me.
ALL LOVE, PEOPLE!
Disclaimer: The images are not mine. Credits to the owners.